cure?

止痛药在哪里。。TT
生理和心理都很痛。。TT
原以为你说要来真的会开心。。
是的。。的确很开心。。
不过。。只是短暂的。。TT

悲伤并没有因此而停止。。
我真是无能。。haiz。。
看来只有自救才有用。。
可是，我要救自己吗？TT

那个伤口就等于炸弹。。
一触即发。。TT
只需要无意的一句话。。
haiz。。可以停止悲观吗？
试一试吧。。><

人要往好的方面想。。
我会的。。TT

还是要谢谢你。。
我的错竟然变成你道歉。。
你对我太好了。。
我竟然不懂珍惜。。TT
对不起。。建隆。。
辛苦你了。。TT。。

o.o

pain pain go away ~

new number..

bought a new hp number..
things can change..
but heart cannot.. TT
whatever i did still remain..TT

ytd night still cried..
what the hell so nice to cry?
i donno.. TT
i realised whenever i cried
gastric pain will occur..><
it's so suffer.. @@

time will solve everything..
let's wait and see... TT

went to comic shop just now..
the auntie asked me to work..
she said start on tomorrow..><
11am until 8.30pm everyday..
until 15 september.. lols..

maybe it's good for me..
instead of crying everyday or do nonsense..
let me try to calm down myself.. ><

i still felt so sorry for u...TT
but nothing i could do...TT
just hope that u are fine.. ><
although u not fine.. TT

...

pain..

it's so painful... T_____T
i have never been like this ever..

知错认错又能怎么样。。
这个世界是残酷的。。TT

whenever i'm able to sleep..
i wish that i will never wake up anymore..
T_____T...

but it is impossible..><
u were suffering too.. but urs is worse..
i donno what can i do to relief ur pain..
i can only cry.. i only know cry..
how stupid am i... TT

how good if u have never ever met me..
u wont have such stupid gf..
u wont have to suffer..cry...stun...TT
it's all my fault...

i scare that i can't stand it anymore..TT
day by day my 罪恶感 increase..TT
can i tahan until open school ? TT
i donno...

TT

我受不了了。。T___T。。
失眠到很离谱。。T__T
10pm开始睡。。
每个小时被自己惊醒。。
一醒就哭。。TT
为什么会这样的？？TT
已经5次了。。TT
为什么一直发梦到那些？TT
我就快崩溃了。。TT..
原来真的不能失去你。。TT
but what can i do TT
tell me pls... TT

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GG..

...

抽血。。很痛。。
真相。。更痛。。
我亲手断送了自己的未来。。
做了自己也过不了自己的过错。。
挣扎了好久终于告诉你。。T__T
因为真的太痛苦了。。

又一次让你彻底的失望了。。
我太离谱了。。T___T。。
对不起有用吗？

没有！！

没脸见你了。。
我不配。。
你很痛，我知道。。
我更痛。。T__T

sticky

woots.. sticky with your name on it.. xD special
RM15 is still okay.. O.O 1 year once ma..

but why i so care about the flow of money?
hmm.. every time i eat i will feel guilty LOL..
although my mum ask me to eat more.. @@
maybe it's not the money i earn myself ~ haiz...
Carol ah... pls grow up faster and earn money for own !!

btw.. able to go out and date with u was one of the happiest & enjoyful moment ever ~ xD

i'm full of smile whole day xD can felt it deep in my heart xD although walking for so long journey would be tired, but it's all worth ~ coz it's with u..

Every moment spent with u, is a moment I treasure ^^

we went to book fest.. it's so crowded O.O people moutain people sea LOL...

wanted to buy book... but wait.. the money will gone fast O.O forget about it ..

I rather to used the money on food LOL.. when I become so "counting-mind" TT

walk and walk for so long time xD ... i keep on shouting here pain there pain ~ hmm

troublesome girl obviously ~ no choice, it's not what I want TT

it's raining O.O we walk to pavilion and then to timesquare.. 

planning to eat BBQ plaza ~ things weren't go as smooth as what we tot ~

the BBQ Plaza is full of people and they said they're closed ... yerrr...

then? marry brown LOL... ate chicken rice... O.O so cold de chicken.. lols

went to lowyat... bought a new SONY pendrive ~ 16GB RM31.. O.O

time to back wangsa maju ~ TT time passes so fast ~ 1 day is over soon ~

u said still got dinner LOL... then u fetch me to wangsa walk to eat Little Wok.. xD

夺命追魂call came le.. keep asking me at where ~ LOL... 

back to hostel lo... stay in the car.. i see u.. u see me LOL

1 yr over already y u still so leng zai xD.. but i'm down ~

the feeling of sad came again TT because of sem break lols...

viewing back my diary.. i realize every time before sem break i also behave like this...

seems like every time also feel like crying... what the hell so nice to cry leh @@

i also donno xD... cannot meet then cannot meet la... LOL...

maybe this is what called mad ~ yes... i'm still mad... 

i'm really glad that i'm still mad ... LOL... bcoz i still love u ♥

i afraid that i have lost the feeling towards u... ">__<"

so.. this is a good sign ? isn't it ? xDDD

yea... 3 more day to exam.. last paper ^^

must study hard and don let myself down ah... xD

but I know friday i will definitely wont be happy... 

coz it's really last day ~ after that have to wait 3 weeks TT

wuuuu... 不好玩的。。

same question come to my mind again...

how am I gonna pass through this hardship (the 3 weeks) LOL...

not sure ~ let it be.. everything is gonna be alright ~ xD

treat it as a training ba... for myself... not to be too dependent on u.. O.O

lalala... finally.. hope that u will be fine throughout the 3 weeks ~

stay healthy and happy ^^ i won't leave u so easily like what u dream of de xD

knowing that u cried bcoz of me is so uncomfortable ~ o.o

but also knew that .. 原来失去我.. 你会那么伤心 O.O

so.. so.. so... i won't leave u la.. as what i've wrote before.. xD

i won't be the one that say bb first xD 

i will stay beside u as long as u need me ♥

hopefully u will be the same also... then we will become 老公公老婆婆 xD

panda ~

woots... my panda bag xD...
finally the OS test is over... O.o
sooo tired @@.. but feel released xD..
8 more days to go for last paper...
pls work harder and don let myself regret..
btw... thanks dear ^^ for accompany whole day xD...
love u always n appreciate every moment spent with u...
we will last long xDD...
becoz my feeling for u has came back...
last few weeks... or perhaps this few month i kept of thinking nonsense..
i felt that im so cool to u... @@
i thought something gonna be happen...
luckily there is ntg happen... xD..
although there were some weird n sad moment...where i felt so uncomfortable n tired...
but at last... i realise that it was just illusion... xD
im still the carol that love u that mad..xD
u treat me so good n yet i kept think of nonsense... so sorry for that O.O
although we didnt really argue before...but cold war always happened.. o.o
i don like such thing to be happen but to prevent argue..no choice @@
1 yr really passes so fast ~ im really touch coz u rmb the promise to chg the status... xD thats the moment i realized i still love u so much.. n the feeling of love not getting lesser but growing stronger o.o...
just that i tried to hide it deep in my heart...
there is some days where i kept blame myself for this n that.. its actually still lack of confident o.o
as a girl n also a very sensitive girl, i very care how u will treat me...
maybe i thought that the way u treat me now is different from before.. so i worried lols...
but actually these are just normal thing..
u r just the one u used to be.. ofcouse after 1 yr everything become normal...
its me myself the stupid mind that think too much ~
so... really sorry dear...
u care me so much ... kept asking me to slp n rest more...
bring me to eat always...
n sometimes purposely bring mi for breakfast.... i appreciate it so much.. xD..
no one can ever do that to me except family.. treat me so good for no reason..
n u r the one...
i always know that its not neccessary for someone to treat u good.. so when it occurs... pls appreciate it carol xD...
dont let myself regret... xD

so... after 1 yr... i still wan to say... thanks for every single thing u hv done for me...
i will always love u, before..now..n ever... my dear kian leong xD

cheers ~

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考试～

一下子就考了2个paper。。 LOL
时间也过得太快了吧。。xD
今天总算可以relax一下了 O.O
下个星期二考Java @@
预测看我几时会开始读书？LOL

hmm。。i guess should be sunday。。xD
whatever ~ let's wait and see ^^

long long time didn't use english to express my thoughts..
although it's much easier to type than chinese ~
but  sometimes it cannot bring out what i really want xD
anyways... what have I done today ? O.O
moviessss xDD

it's because as someone said..
we should enjoy life ~ xD
YES.. i learnt how to enjoy.. from u xD
but why time passes so fast ? ">__<"
many thing to be done but haven't start ~

don't care ~~
time to sleep.. xD
good night my dear ♥

一年了 ♥♥♥

终于一年咯 xD
你问我下一个目标是几年？
我说。。forever。。xDD

建隆，我爱你，好爱你 ♥
Every moment spent with you,
is a moment I treasure ^^

八月了。。

又来到八月了！
八月对我来说都蛮有回忆的。。
因为去年的八月。。
就改变了我接下来的日子 xD
还有三天就一年了。。xD

去年的这个时候。。
我每天都面带笑容。。LOL
总之想到你就会傻笑。。
坠入情网的象征 xD
连自己都觉得自己mad了～

现在回想都觉得有些幼稚 LOL
不过这种feel不是每个人都给到的吧。。
毕竟一生只有一个第一次。。
怎样都会傻一次，笨一次吧 LOL
hmm...值得回忆。。

一个月。。两个月。。
半年。。一年。。
一下子就过去了也。。
甜酸苦辣全部都taste过了。。xD
接下来没有热恋了咯。。
要靠的只有。。
真正想要在一起的两个人。。O.O
so。。一起加油吧。。xD

和一年前一样。。
我要和你长长久久！
执子之手，与子偕老。。
一起生仔，组织家庭 xDD
我要生个leng zai。。LOL
遗传你的大眼睛 xDD
名字一定要叫 kx ！！
leng lui叻？不知道。。
乖巧懂事就好。。xD

这一年里面。。
假如做了很多令你不开心的事
请多多原谅。。">___<"
毕竟人都会有缺点。。
我会improve自己的！

当然。。还是要谢谢你。。
谢谢你陪我度过那么。。
美好、兴奋、有趣的一年。。♥